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Northwind's Musings

Bikes in the Belfry


July 23, 2008
Story by NorthWind.

Photo credits as noted



I was sitting in the garage thinking about nothing mostly, and listening to the rain. Looking at my bike that needed washing. Again. Ought to just roll it back and let Mother Nature do it, but she's short of soap, and that's probably for the best. I got to thinking about bikes that have flown through my life. Some I've owned, and a lot that I might have just gotten a look at, but they've made an impression somehow. This motorcycling thing might be a disease or disorder. No, that's wrong. Well it certainly is a condition, for sure.

The Impression and the Incident
We all get this. Male or female, somewhere, sometime, you saw a particular motorcycle, and it made an impression. Probably nothing spectacular, like a motorcycle cop, or the hard-bitten rider who looked to have as many miles on him as the bike he rode (the owner and dog looking alike thing). Then there's the Incident where you got close enough, and heard the silent call, or felt the pull. Might have just been a ride on the back of one. For me, I don’t know. I knew my dad had a 175cc 2-stroke in post-war Germany for a time, never saw a picture. Did see lots of cops on Harleys around Toronto - 1960s, and some shady-looking characters. They all looked good to me, so it must have been the bikes, not the riders. First ride that I drove was a black French moped. Looked like something off the moon, and it stank, but I was hooked riding around in a laneway. Hell, that sounds like something illicit. Might just as well have been, the way our parents looked at it. Well, that's why we were in the laneway.

The Early Stages
A couple of my friends had older brothers, and in their group, it was all about bikes for a time. We hung around and soaked up the atmosphere and horseshit, getting in the way, hanging on every word like these guys were it. We were 14, and these men of the world might have been 17. One bought a 100cc Yamaha, and had it for a while til his girlfriend (or his mother, can't recall) made him sell it. Probably the girlfriend. Yeah, that must have been it. Can’t see him listening to his mom, but the girl, well...The other bought a 1967 Triumph Bonneville, and THAT bike set the hook for me. I remember scrubbing carb parts in a bucket of solvent with a toothbrush (mine) just for a ride afterward. He eventually sold it for a new Yamaha 250 Enduro. I stared at this shiny new thing, but I was stricken. "You,...you TRADED-IN the Bonnie? For...THIS?"

These guys and their circle had some bikes that would be worth a mint today. A Honda 305 Dream, a Jawa, and a collection of British and other Japanese bikes. And the thing that made my knees weaker than any bikini-clad girl could - a big old pristine Zundapp. Well I was 14, ok? Took me a little longer to get my priorities straight. They stopped making opposed twins in 1957, I think. I walked around that beast for hours while he was chatting up the fairer sex. Looked more like a BMW than a BMW, and it actually made noise. A bit more flair to the fenders and styling. Like comparing plain Jane to Marlene Dietrich. To me, the thing called out to be loved, and I knew it needed what we now call Beach bars. But like any teenager at the time, he knew exactly what to do. Megaphones and ape-hangers. Turned a classic into a cartoon. Well it worked well for the Bonnie, but this? Sacrilege. The bike was totaled in an accident a few months later. Would a bike commit suicide out of shame?
 
1957 Zundapp KS601 Sport model 600cc, and very fast for a 1957 bike. The transmission uses chain-driven sprockets. Photo copyright www.zundappfool.com Used by kind permission.



I used to go to McBrides Cycle every chance I got. They had bicycles upstairs, and downstairs, it was heaven for a kid like me. The latest Kawasakis, every BSA model, and Lord, they had Ducati thumpers! Damned near erotic. As long as you didn't hurt the bikes, or lick the fenders, they'd let kids hang around a while. They weren't stupid, they knew it was just a matter of time before you'd be back with money. They closed a year or so ago after something like 80 years. Made me sad.

I saw Harleys everywhere. Regular ones in the city mostly, and customs every time I went to the beach. The Toronto Police Electra-Glides were all a kind of light gunmetal-gray, and only the Harley styling made them look any good. Even the customized hogs seemed impossibly large, and way cool. The Kawasaki H1 triple screamed by, and I was paying attention. Ok, you could fog out mosquitos, sure, but what got my notice was how freaking quick it was. First time I saw a Norton, I was mesmerized. A guy used to come by my high school on a chopped BSA. Heard him say it had high compression pistons. He used to park outside and wait. When the right girl came out, he’d use his hand to kick it over. Until it kicked back one day. I learned a few new words right there. Well I already knew the "high compression pistons" part.

Handling it
Well that's easy. You get your own, somehow. Simple. Just scratch the itch, right? Nope. You know how that itch works. I had my own bike, and still couldn't turn down a request to check out an H2 750 triple that an older friend had rebuilt for him. He hadn't ridden in 25 years. Sounded like 3 nests of gigantic pissed off hornets between my legs. Went like a greyhound being chased by 3 nests of gigantic... And handled like the lousy frame technology that it was infamous for. I brought it back to him, told him it worked fine, and strongly suggested that he not use it to get reacquainted with motorcycling. I already knew he wasn’t listening. After all, he’d been bitten back when I was in diapers. And I did all that on a clear New Years Day. In Canada. Oh man...another new word. Hypothermia. Brighter folks here use a different phrase - snowmobile suit.

I went through years, decades of joy. Well not all of it. Some was just grim riding on an old commuter horse. But hell, it was riding. Had an amazing 550 that was game for anything, as long as it was pavement. Squirmy and nervous as a spooked pony on a dirt road. Bought & sold 2 old Honda products without ever riding them, just the way it worked out, and I'm still kicking myself over letting one of them out of my grasp. Finally bought the bike I'd wanted for years, and found out I really didn’t want to go 155mph anymore, but it’s nice to have that whoosh with a clear passing lane and a honey pumper that has to be passed while my nasal passages still function. I’m always a tad worried about droppings behind those things...


Acceptance
These days, I've learned to manage the condition. I've come to grips with it, and my Milwaukee warthog and I rumble around for hours on end wondering briefly what's down that road over there, or over that hill yonder. But flare-ups are possible. Went to a dealer in Wasaga Beach to get an oil filter for my road warrior Ninja, and as I was walking to the bike, I heard a silent call, and stopped. Looking back toward their used bike compound, my knees got weak for a moment, as I was thrown back to 1968. The old aluminum was dull, but Marlene Dietrich had my undivided attention anyway. She had taken the earthbound form of an airhead Zundapp. And she'd brought along her sidecar.





Story (c) 2008 Northwind.
All rights Reserved. May not be reprinted without written permission
of photographer and author. Contact: northwind@rumblenews.com